Well dad, you know me, there’s almost ALWAYS an excuse, and this time the reason you didn’t get a fathers day card is mainly because of the crazy weather we’ve had this week (you know, island – planes – wild winds etc etc). So after you mentioned on the phone the other day how you “didn’t want any present since ‘Father’s Day’ is just a commercial day made up to make money but a nice card would do”, I decided then that even if I did end up sending you a card, it still wouldn’t say all the things I’d like to say to you. So I’m doing it here.
I remember being small sitting on your shoulders in the park, and you pretending to fall over,the utter fear as I’d grab onto your face. And now find that you do the same daredevil stuff with my children much to their delight and my despair. I remember you giving out to me the only time I ever skipped school, not so much for mitching, but for ‘doing it on my own doorstep’ (I hid in the Botanic Gardens, my school was right beside it….I obviously hadn’t thought it through), I remember the posters you used to bring me home from The Broadstone, I mean how lucky was I to have a Linda Nolan autographed picture made out to me. I also however remember the Dracula poster – not so pleasant, especially when you told me that before Dracula would appear there would be lots of eerie smoke – let me tell you, you never knew how often I thought I saw eerie smoke in my room whilst lying terrified in bed. I remember breakfast in bed, always when least expected. I remember you were with me when I went up to collect my leaving certificate results, and even though deep down I knew I didn’t do great, you said to me – ‘it doesn’t matter whats on the paper ok’ and that made me happy. I remember you covering me with the ‘tin foil’ blanket you had when we used to go to overnight fishing competitions, you always let me go with you even though you knew that as soon as it started to get dark the sandhoppers would be out and I’d be hysterical. I remember you working every day from early just to make sure the bills were paid and we never went without. I remember you made us stilts. From big blocks of wood. On top of other big blocks of wood. Not very safe, but very very fun! I remember the phonecall that told me that there was a ticket waiting from me in New York to bring me back home. I remember you removing the fuse in the house so that you could scare the life out of all of us in a game of scary hide and seek. The squeals out of us all, children and adults alike. Hilarious altogether (but not at the time…) I remember it was you who decided to ring me to tell me about Tikitiboo, knowing my heart would be broken, and how yours was when we lost Amber (Dirty Belly). I remember on the morning of my wedding before we left for the church, you told me that if I had any doubts, or didn’t want to go through with it, that would be fine, I just had to say the word and you’d take care of everything. Not of course because you didn’t want me to marry him, but because you love me and wanted me to know that no matter what, you’d fix everything and anything. And you do. Always.
A very very long time ago, you said to me when I was going to bed one night “if anything ever happens to me, no matter what anybody says, I want you to know that I love you”. I cried that night because in my young years I thought you were going to die. You didn’t need to tell me that though because I know you love me, and I love you and you’ve shaped who I am today, and I hope that makes you proud because I’m proud of you.
Have a lovely non commercial Father’s Day dad, and enjoy your chocolate.